From fat to fit: a year's journey starting from today!

Warning: this first post is quite long.

Starting weight: 13 Stone 13 Pounds.

So this is me. Honesty is the best policy, so I have to be honest with myself. I'm fat and I'm fat because I have been overeating, eating rubbish, drinking a lot and generally not taking care of myself (as in no exercise).

I have wanted to eat healthier and lose weight for a while now but there has always been a reason to put it off until tomorrow, or the next day, or next week...the list of numerical timelines goes on. So over the Christmas period I decided that I have to start and not put it off and January the 1st seemed a great day to do it. Therefore, arming myself with a list of reasons why I have failed in the past, I decided to start this blog in the hope of kickstarting myself into eating healthier, drinking a lot less and losing the weight in the process (as well as getting fitter and more active, of course).

The first thing I did was to make a list of all the reasons I have failed in the past, to arm myself against the things that were, inevitably, going to hinder me along this year's path to a healthier and more active lifestyle. So what were they?

1. Motivation

2. Time

3. Procrastination

4. Tiredness

5. Work

6. Boredom

7. Laziness

8. Lack of Encouragement

9. Temptation

As I was analysing these, I began to notice that they all link. Each one feeds off the other - for instance a lack of motivation can create procrastination; not having enough time can make you lazy and prone to temptations...etc. Here is my analysis as to why each has hindered me and what I intend to do to stop them, even if it is only recognising that they will, at a certain point, try to stop me from achieving my goal.

1. Motivation.

I know that my motivation is high right now, it always is at the start. However, at some point that motivation will slip and slump and will wear off as each day slides into the next. Every day will erase a little bit of the huge motivation I have at the minute, so I will have to watch out for this and find ways of keeping that motivation high. I could watch motivational videos, write this blog, take measurements of my gut, take pictures and compare them, talk to people, use the NHS website...there are so many things I can do (and you can do) if I only look and don't give up and realise that it isn't always going to be easy.

2. Time.

I always tell myself I have so little time. As a teacher I have used that excuse a number of times to make myself feel better about not doing the marking that night, or shoddy planning on occasion. However, when trying to lose weight or eat healthier, this excuse is a big reason for not going for a run, or for eating crap because "I have no time to cook". However, finding time to run is finding time for me, for my health, for my family. There are so many minutes during the day that I can utilise, to get work done, to do a bit of exercise, to eat and savour the flavours in my mouth. If I have time to play a game on my phone, I have time to run or exercise. I have time for me.

3. Procrastination.

I am a huge procrastinator. Why do something today that I can put off until tomorrow? This has been a huge derailer for me (I know derailer is not a word but it serves a purpose), as once I start down this slippery slope, it goes on and on until I am no linger exercising or eating well. "I'll start again tomorrow." is a phrase I have to be very wary of in the coming weeks and months, as is, "One day off won't matter.". It will and does matter because that one day always leads to another and another and... I know there will be times that I can't do a scheduled day, but I have to make sure that it's simply a swap in my calendar, and that I have analysed why I am swapping and not simply doing it because I can't be bothered that night. I need to be honest with myself or I'll simple be another tomorrow man and that is not happening this time. Procrastination...I am ready for you!

4. Tiredness.

As a teacher I have very long days. I wake up at 4.30am and generally go to bed at 11ish. It's a long day, especially when I know that, once I have finished the day job, I have to come home and start again (after my wife and I have fed four kids, tidied, washed up and made pack ups for the next day). So tiredness inevitably leads to loss of motivation, procrastination and laziness. It's always a lot easier to convince myself to do something tomorrow when I am tired, but not doing it today will simply lead to not doing it ever. It's also easier to give in to temptation when my mind and body are tired, so I have to try and fend off that voice in my head that keeps telling me it's ok to have a beer. No...it's not. Additionally, I'm more tired because I'm fat and unfit...so becoming fitter and slimmer and eating right will help my tiredness, so now I know what to look for, I can fight back.

5. Work.

When I have a bad day at work, stress builds up and when I arrive at home, all I want to do is have a beer (or five), a packet of crisps (or seven) and then do nothing...except eat and drink more crap. I have to realise that having bad days are perfect for exercising, because exercising creates endorphins and this will take away the stress and anger and make me feel much better. I have to remember this. This is also the same when I have lots of work to do, which creates that 'TIME' thing again, when I try to tell myself that I cannot do exercise today because I have too much to do. However, taking a break in-between marking books will recharge my battery, stop mental fatigue and boost endorphins (if I do exercises in-between marking - maybe ten press-ups or 20 crunches). Now there are no excuses for me because exercising will stop the stress that work causes and it will help me be fitter and thinner!

6. Boredom.

Boredom is a huge factor for me whenever I have tried to lose weight and be healthier. Running around the same streets, eating the same boring foods, having the same lunches just becomes an episode in dreariness every day. I open my lunch and can hear myself physically groan as I see another vegetable, or another salad. I presume everyone on diets does this? This is why I have decided not to diet, but to eat healthier. So I'm going to have that packet of crisps, but only one. I'm going to have that sandwich for lunch, but on wholemeal bread and with salad in it. I'm going to have a beer but, again, only one during the week...I don't need more than that. I'm going to plan my run journeys to take me to different places; I'm going to vary the music I am playing whilst running; I'm going to walk to the shops rather than drive. There are so many things I can do to stave off boredom and I know that this will take forward planning...which is my plan to eradicate this little bug from my journey.

7. Laziness.

I am naturally lazy. I admit it. Quite often I can't be bothered and this will lead to my motivation dropping exponentially, procrastination will hit an all time high (at least it will tomorrow); I will be bored to death of eating and being healthy and my tiredness will increase rapidly. My laziness leads to excuses, excuses leads to procrastination, which leads to demotivation, which leads to my gut staying fat, my moobs requiring a bra and my possible early death: not something I want to happen. Therefore, I have to actively know and see when I am being lazy and quickly move myself out and away from it. I will have to use strategies such as doing a short, quick set of sit-ups or running on the spot, or maybe reciting a mantra to help kickstart my motivation or maybe even simply watching a YouTube motivational video by David Goggins (you should read his book 'Can't Hurt Me). By stopping my laziness in its tracks, I can keep going and live longer. This, I believe, is my biggest battle.

8. Lack of Encouragement.

There are always those who will try to derail me and tell me it's just another fad or make fun of my journey because I have started so many times before and failed. It's natural for them (and me) to be sceptical about whether this will be 'the time' or just another failure. But, as you can see from this blog post, I am learning about and through my failures. I am analysing what has stopped me in the past so that I can get past them. I also know that people will be eating and drinking the things that I want to eat and drink soooooo badly, but I have to make sure that I am prepared for that and take measures that will stop that lure into the cycle of "I'll just have one now and start again tomorrow." I can't and won't let this stop me from my journey because this is my journey. No one can derail me unless I let them. If I want or need encouragement, there are so many people I can ask and who will help me along the way without a second thought. I can use this blog, the NHS website and forum, the pictures of myself changing...I have to be my own encouragement too. This is my journey: I know it is not going to be easy but there will always be someone there to help.

9. Temptation.

I added this one at the last minute as I walked around my kitchen, gathering my analysis ready to write this blog. All around were left over biscuits, unopened cans of beer from New Year's Eve, cakes, chocolate, bagels etc and everything was hugely tempting: to just have one, drink one, eat one. Temptation is always going to be a factor in my journey because I have kids who, although they are eating healthily, also like crisps and chocolate and fizzy drinks (as part of their balanced diets). So I will have to be able to have a strong will and maybe buy chocolates they like but I don't, or crisps they like but I don't. I do not want to be someone who throws away everything, because I want to have chocolate and beer...but in moderation. So I will learn to savour the taste of the one chocolate and revel in the one packet of crisps I will have. I will enjoy the foods I eat, but I will eat more healthy options and in larger portions and less of the rubbish and in smaller portions. And any time it gets too much, there's always water and a run to take my mind from it. I may even write about the cravings and analyse why I am having them. That may help.

And there you have it. The reasons why I have failed in the past but will not fail this time. I mean failure as a term of stopping completely and returning to drink and crap. There will be times when I have two packets of crisps, I am sure, but I cannot let that stop me, derail me or force me into total failure because I won't let it. I will learn in this journey and I will enjoy it...mostly!

If you have made it this far, thank you for staying with me, not every one will be this long...I promise. This has been an enlightening start for me and hopefully for you too. I intend to continue to look at these blogs, and write them each day: some long, some short. I know that there will be ups and downs along the way and hopefully you'll share your journey with me too.

Thank you for reading and see you tomorrow.

Sean.